Not that you all are surfing the net for news on stars... but in case you are, McAfee just released the top 10 most DANGEROUS celebs to search for. Last year, Brad Pitt was the most dangerous, but he has just lost his title as the Most Dangerous as Jessica Biel has overtaken the number one space.
People searching for “Jessica Biel” have a one in five chance of landing at a Web site that has an online threat, such as spyware, adware, spam, phishing, viruses and other malware. Searching for the latest celebrity news and downloads can cause serious damage to your personal computer.
You'll also see the cybercriminals at work through facebook, twitter, and UTube just to name a few. If you get an email that says "Click on this" or "download this" verify that the email was actually sent by a reputable source before you click. A lot of the criminals can set up phony urls that start with the application name but end in something different. An example is application name (like facebook) followed by wait_till_u_see_this. While it looks like it came from facebook because it has facebook.com in the url, it is actually a malicious website aimed at doing harm to your computer or stealing from you. Once clicked, the program can infiltrate your computer in seconds and steal information or download a virus on to your computer.
It's real and it's scary. You can visit stophcommerce.com to educate yourself on hacker commerce (the business that is bigger than drug trade - the business of hacking in to a computer and stealing information.)
Make sure that you are monitoring your children's use of the computer as well... I know my kids will download anything that pops up on the screen just to get rid of the box.
Part of staying strong is protecting yourself. I have a very smart and savvy friend who was recently a victim of malware that stole her banking information. In minutes, she had money transferred out of her bank account and her debit card used at a retail store in another state. Literally, it happened in the blink of an eye, and it took her days to remedy the situation. None of us are immune to the hackers.
Stay Strong and Be Safe!
Mecca
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
Routines
With the first day of school here, my intention was to write about routines. I thought about it all weekend - why routines are good for kids (and parents!) and what new routines I would start along with the new school routine. We have positive school habits like most families: early bed time and limited TV / video game time, etc.
But the morning was not about routines. When I was walking the boys to school, just as soon as we passed the crossing guard, he collapsed. Luckily my 5th grader had walked ahead with his cousin. But my 1st grader and I saw it as it happened. His little face was mixed with concern and fear as we turned and saw the man crumpled in the street. It was awful. He had just crossed us safely 3 minutes before. Several fathers rushed to assist, and a policeman was yards away and quickly called an ambulance, but the crossing guard passed away at the hospital.
This evening I will be asked the hard questions. About life, and about the end of life. Years ago, when dealing with another death, I was counseled on telling a child that someone had died. The counselor was incredibly helpful. She said that we (adults) "over detail" our children. Children don't need details; they just need facts. Instead of trying to explain something that you really can't - you just state the facts, and then you can identify and/or relate to the child's emotions. "He died." "Why?" "His heart stopped." "Oh, why did his heart stop?" "I am really not sure." (It is okay not to have all the answers.) "That is sad." "Yes, it is sad." (Hug your child.)
I'm sure that I will be asked if he is in heaven. We get this question a lot from the kids. The four year old often asks who or what goes to heaven. Do houses go to heaven? (no); plants? (I'm sure this is because I kill so many of them - no); dogs? (yes - although I'm not sure but I say yes); fish? (no). I find that talking about heaven is much easier than talking about death.
The thing about talking about death is that we want to provide answers without worrying our children. Death should not be scary. It is sad, but not frightening.
I feel very sad for the family of the crossing guard. I hope that he and his family exchanged good, loving words this morning, before he went off to his new job protecting our children. I feel sad that the first day of school will be marked by the death of someone that wanted to keep our children safe.
When confronted with death, I think of how much I have in life. It makes any issue that is on my mind today (juggling schedules, getting the laundry done, even paying bills) seem insignificant.
What matters most is a developing a routine of loving our children and other important people in our lives. I'd be interested to hear how you make that part of your routine. Let me know by commenting on the post.
Be thankful today for the children in your arms and the people that you love that are with you. And, please, say a prayer tonight for the families who have lost the ones they love.
Stay Strong!
Mecca
But the morning was not about routines. When I was walking the boys to school, just as soon as we passed the crossing guard, he collapsed. Luckily my 5th grader had walked ahead with his cousin. But my 1st grader and I saw it as it happened. His little face was mixed with concern and fear as we turned and saw the man crumpled in the street. It was awful. He had just crossed us safely 3 minutes before. Several fathers rushed to assist, and a policeman was yards away and quickly called an ambulance, but the crossing guard passed away at the hospital.
This evening I will be asked the hard questions. About life, and about the end of life. Years ago, when dealing with another death, I was counseled on telling a child that someone had died. The counselor was incredibly helpful. She said that we (adults) "over detail" our children. Children don't need details; they just need facts. Instead of trying to explain something that you really can't - you just state the facts, and then you can identify and/or relate to the child's emotions. "He died." "Why?" "His heart stopped." "Oh, why did his heart stop?" "I am really not sure." (It is okay not to have all the answers.) "That is sad." "Yes, it is sad." (Hug your child.)
I'm sure that I will be asked if he is in heaven. We get this question a lot from the kids. The four year old often asks who or what goes to heaven. Do houses go to heaven? (no); plants? (I'm sure this is because I kill so many of them - no); dogs? (yes - although I'm not sure but I say yes); fish? (no). I find that talking about heaven is much easier than talking about death.
The thing about talking about death is that we want to provide answers without worrying our children. Death should not be scary. It is sad, but not frightening.
I feel very sad for the family of the crossing guard. I hope that he and his family exchanged good, loving words this morning, before he went off to his new job protecting our children. I feel sad that the first day of school will be marked by the death of someone that wanted to keep our children safe.
When confronted with death, I think of how much I have in life. It makes any issue that is on my mind today (juggling schedules, getting the laundry done, even paying bills) seem insignificant.
What matters most is a developing a routine of loving our children and other important people in our lives. I'd be interested to hear how you make that part of your routine. Let me know by commenting on the post.
Be thankful today for the children in your arms and the people that you love that are with you. And, please, say a prayer tonight for the families who have lost the ones they love.
Stay Strong!
Mecca
Thursday, August 20, 2009
welcome
Hi! Thanks for stopping by. StrongMom is dedicated to provide anything that might help a mom stay strong - while I can't give you an extra hour of sleep; I hope to provide you with any kind of tip that has worked for me with my children, as well as recipes, relationship tips, encouragement, etc. We moms need to stick together!
What are my credentials? Five children (no twins, all single births) ranging from age 11 to 2. Two girls, three boys. One child with Down Syndrome. One child with ADHD. I also have a full time job, travel, and participate in church activities. Yes, I have a wonderful hubby, too. Our lives are full and wonderful and quite busy.
Tonight, my StrongMom tip is just the basic principle of parenting: Consistency. If you can't get this right, don't try anything else. You must, above all, be consistent. This means if you say you're going to do something, do it. Too often, parenting is inconvenient. At our house, we have a no tolerance policy for whining. Our four year old often violates this policy. And at the worst times. I've just gotten home from work, and still in my high heels I am preparing dinner. He's had his snack at the alotted time of 4:00, but when I walk in it seems that like Pavlov's experiments I've triggered the "I need a snack" reflex. I don't give in - I remind him that dinner is on the way (see Mommy cooking it?) And he begins to whine. It is completely inconvenient for me to stop what I am doing and take him to the chair placed in his room for punishment. So I warn... and warn again... and the whining doesn't stop. Why? Because he knows I'm busy. And I have seven mouths to feed at 6:30 when my husband walks in the door. And there are other children in the house that need something. Have you been there?
But, here's the key - when I stop what I am doing, and gently but firmly take him in to his room and place him on the chair, and tell him that he will be sitting there until he stops whining - the whining comes to a complete and sustained halt. Yes, he will try us frequently. And if we, without warning, simply take him to the chair when he whines for the first time, we can go DAYS without whining. Even weeks. Unfortunately that one time when we warn, and warn, and warn without stopping what we do will completely undo all the good work that we've done with the no tolerance policy... so we must start over.
Mom's - it is in your hands. It's in your control. If there is a behavior that your child is doing that you don't like, be consistent about stopping it. AND DO NOT NEGOTIATE. Child not eating dinner? The consequence is no snack, no cereal, no dessert, no nothing. Don't budge. Don't be swayed in to a sandwich or something small. If your goal is to have your child eat his/her dinner, then save that dinner plate for when he/she asks for food. Our parents did it. And it works. But the moment you give in and give something else, you've just invited a whole months worth of work in to your home to undo your moment of weakness. Stay Strong, Mom!
The key to staying strong is to first be consistent in all things. If you say your child gets a reward for doing something well - then reward him. We'll talk rewards later, but when I say reward please know that I am saying TIME and not money. We have turned our children in to materialistic consumers instead of giving contributors... again, another post for that topic. Consistency in all things is the same as having integrity - doing what you say you are going to do, in all situations. Don't threaten something that you know you will never do. (example: telling your child that if he acts up on vacation that he'll never come back on vacation with you again... unless you have childcare for a week and could really live with yourself if you didn't bring him with you the next year.) Children are not stupid. Even children with developmental delays will call your bluff - I have living proof in my oldest daughter. If my husband threatens something that will never happen (I'll leave you at home alone while we go have fun at the pool) she'll say "RIGHT, DAD!" in a sarcastic way and won't change her behavior. If he warns her of a real, impending punishment (If you continue to do that you will lose TV priviledges for an entire day) she'll immediately change her behavior.
Okay friends, here's my last word on consistency - think before you threaten - understand exactly what you want your child to do - and DO what you say you are going to do. While inconvenient, stop what you are doing to do what you said you would do. I have to stop now and put five little tired children to bed, because I said that bedtime is 9:00 tonight and I have 8 minutes to keep my word.
Thanks again for sharing a few minutes with me. Post your comments, and your consistency stories for others to see!
Stay Strong!
StrongMom
What are my credentials? Five children (no twins, all single births) ranging from age 11 to 2. Two girls, three boys. One child with Down Syndrome. One child with ADHD. I also have a full time job, travel, and participate in church activities. Yes, I have a wonderful hubby, too. Our lives are full and wonderful and quite busy.
Tonight, my StrongMom tip is just the basic principle of parenting: Consistency. If you can't get this right, don't try anything else. You must, above all, be consistent. This means if you say you're going to do something, do it. Too often, parenting is inconvenient. At our house, we have a no tolerance policy for whining. Our four year old often violates this policy. And at the worst times. I've just gotten home from work, and still in my high heels I am preparing dinner. He's had his snack at the alotted time of 4:00, but when I walk in it seems that like Pavlov's experiments I've triggered the "I need a snack" reflex. I don't give in - I remind him that dinner is on the way (see Mommy cooking it?) And he begins to whine. It is completely inconvenient for me to stop what I am doing and take him to the chair placed in his room for punishment. So I warn... and warn again... and the whining doesn't stop. Why? Because he knows I'm busy. And I have seven mouths to feed at 6:30 when my husband walks in the door. And there are other children in the house that need something. Have you been there?
But, here's the key - when I stop what I am doing, and gently but firmly take him in to his room and place him on the chair, and tell him that he will be sitting there until he stops whining - the whining comes to a complete and sustained halt. Yes, he will try us frequently. And if we, without warning, simply take him to the chair when he whines for the first time, we can go DAYS without whining. Even weeks. Unfortunately that one time when we warn, and warn, and warn without stopping what we do will completely undo all the good work that we've done with the no tolerance policy... so we must start over.
Mom's - it is in your hands. It's in your control. If there is a behavior that your child is doing that you don't like, be consistent about stopping it. AND DO NOT NEGOTIATE. Child not eating dinner? The consequence is no snack, no cereal, no dessert, no nothing. Don't budge. Don't be swayed in to a sandwich or something small. If your goal is to have your child eat his/her dinner, then save that dinner plate for when he/she asks for food. Our parents did it. And it works. But the moment you give in and give something else, you've just invited a whole months worth of work in to your home to undo your moment of weakness. Stay Strong, Mom!
The key to staying strong is to first be consistent in all things. If you say your child gets a reward for doing something well - then reward him. We'll talk rewards later, but when I say reward please know that I am saying TIME and not money. We have turned our children in to materialistic consumers instead of giving contributors... again, another post for that topic. Consistency in all things is the same as having integrity - doing what you say you are going to do, in all situations. Don't threaten something that you know you will never do. (example: telling your child that if he acts up on vacation that he'll never come back on vacation with you again... unless you have childcare for a week and could really live with yourself if you didn't bring him with you the next year.) Children are not stupid. Even children with developmental delays will call your bluff - I have living proof in my oldest daughter. If my husband threatens something that will never happen (I'll leave you at home alone while we go have fun at the pool) she'll say "RIGHT, DAD!" in a sarcastic way and won't change her behavior. If he warns her of a real, impending punishment (If you continue to do that you will lose TV priviledges for an entire day) she'll immediately change her behavior.
Okay friends, here's my last word on consistency - think before you threaten - understand exactly what you want your child to do - and DO what you say you are going to do. While inconvenient, stop what you are doing to do what you said you would do. I have to stop now and put five little tired children to bed, because I said that bedtime is 9:00 tonight and I have 8 minutes to keep my word.
Thanks again for sharing a few minutes with me. Post your comments, and your consistency stories for others to see!
Stay Strong!
StrongMom
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